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THE URTHLINGS - Section 22

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THE URTHLINGS - Section 21

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THE OBSERVATORY - Entry # 0008: ROAD RAGE

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By MRAM

June 27, 2009


DRIVER RE-EDUCATION?

Why is it that so many Earthlings have problems when it comes to operating automobiles? Yet they have somehow qualified to obtain driver's licenses?

Here on our world, every one of us must obey the traffic laws or we risk getting thrown in jail, or incinerated. So, when I scope out the drivers there on Earth, I want to throw up in my mouth. Many of you should not be behind the wheel.

First off, I assume that a red light and a stop sign mean the same for your species as it does for us over here, right? It means STOP, Geniuses! But time and time again I catch reckless individuals driving right through those points and stepping on the gas instead of stopping, let alone slowing down. And don't give me any garbage pertaining to literacy. Red means stop, whether you can read or not.

Worse than running lights are those morons that cut other law abiding drivers off. Ok, I know that they don't care about laws, but it also seems these idiots are oblivious to the fact that these rules were put in place to keep everybody safe. Yet, when someone doesn't signal and/or cuts them off, the intelligence level seems to drop dramatically and these 'so-called' qualified drivers go into one hard rampage freakout. I think the name you have given this disease is "ROAD RAGE". These 'victims' either cuss the other driver out (oh, and more often than not, the other commuter cannot or will not hear the incensed driver), or they will proceed to follow them to do something they might regret later (aw, c'mon, what are they REALLY going to do when they come face to face????). Worse yet, gunfire may erupt on the roadway. But screw safety, right? These RIGHTEOUS drivers are on a justified mission of vengeance. "Grrr...I'm human and I have to take revenge. I have no control over what I do. Grrrr...I allow my anger to take control of me." You are one interesting species, I'll give you that.

Now, my opinion is if you're one of the above, don't get upset if something happens to you or your family. You're that way, so why should someone else be different?

OR!!! Or you can learn to follow the laws. How about less tailgaiting? And less driving 20 mph over the speed limit? Here's a thought - instead of going 70 in a 50 road, why not wake up 20 minutes early? Hey, congratulations! What a nice suggestion! (Can you sense my sarcasm?)

All in all, your world would be a little safer to drive in if you all paid attention. Turn that damn cell phone off and drive!

'What? Nothing's going to happen to me.' Yeah, those are the kind that it happens to. When you feel immortal or invincible, something is going to shut you down fast.

URTHLINGS - Section 20

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THE OBSERVATORY - Entry # 0007: IN REMEMBRANCE

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By Michael L. Ramirez
June 25, 2009

First off, I would like to take a moment to pay my respect & remember the 3 Celebrities we lost this past week. Ed McMahon (The Sidekick), Farrah Fawcett (The Angel) & Michael Jackson (The King Of Pop). Each one in their own way made an impact on this world when they were with us. They will be missed.

It really doesn't matter what planet you're on let alone which universe. When tragedy hits, the feeling is generally understood. Another observation I have is one that we all can relate to...

If a loved one becomes sick, Who feels the most pain? Hypothetically speaking, of course. Obviously, the one fighting to stay healthy is the right, albeit unfortunate choice. But, to the many supporters that are usually made up of family and friends, there is an overwhelming sense of helplessness. The feeling of wanting to make things better like a mother would care for their child is totally in play.

The person lying in bed doesn't need your sympathy or even your tears. That person is already aware of his / her situation and just needs everybody's strength and support. More often than not, we tend to start treating the afflicted as if they are 'leaving', for lack of a better term at the moment. It's hard, which is understood, but we have to enjoy the time that we have with that person. While they are still physically and mentally able and while we are still privileged to have them in our lives.

So many times, we tend to lose sight of what is important. Our priorities get so mixed up that we forget that the most important things in life are family, friends and a long healthy life. Keep in touch with those special people. In this day and age of email, IM's and cell phones, there are no more excuses. Again, we are not going to be here forever. Take advantage of your life and be grateful that you are still here to see another day. Unfortunately, some of us cannot afford that luxury.

Remember your family and friends. Don't fall into the trap of feeling regret. You cannot change the past but you can definitely learn from experience to help guide you from this day forward. Try not to sweat the little things. Stay up.

As for that special person that needs you there? Just BE There. In any way that you can. Your support and understanding, and most importantly your love can AND will do wonders. Try to enjoy life because we are all here on borrowed time. Rough, I know, but that's the truth. Sort out what's important to you, surround yourselves with things that make you happy, and just have faith, any kind of faith, and you should be ok.

Fate will take it from there.

I notice that we lose good people everyday while evil seems to live forever. This is a crazy world that's for sure.

Which leads me to this question, "In the end, who really are the lucky ones?"

The ones that are here,

or the ones that are leaving?

Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa

URTHLINGS - Section 19

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URTHLINGS - Section 18

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URTHLINGS - Section 17

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URTHLINGS - Section 16

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THE OBSERVATORY - Entry # 0006: COMIC BOOKS & HOLLYWOOD

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By MRAM
June 20, 2009


"HOLY "WARPED INTERPRETATION", BATMAN!"


I enjoy comic books as much as the next geek… that’s first and foremost. And when the powers that be decide to make a movie based on a particular comic book I follow, well that’s just icing on the proverbial cake.

You would think that the transition from page to screen would be smooth, right? Wrong.

I don’t think when Stan Lee and Jack “King” Kirby created “The Incredible Hulk” they were trying to show the many angles pertaining to the duality of man. WTF?

I'm in no hurry to watch the angry green guy on the big screen as a troubled adult who is struggling to repress memories of a traumatic childhood, only to have ‘monstrous’ results with the aid of a few shots of gamma radiation. I want to see the big lug go heads up with comic book foes like The Abomination (Kudos for having that character in the second Hulk film, by the way.) or even his most famous opponent, Wolverine!

Is that too much to ask? Well, apparently…yes.

And speaking of “Wolverine’, I look at the “X-MEN” & "WOLVERINE" movies as separate entities in relation to their comic book counterparts. I want to see the stories, characters and costumes that I had grown familiar with. The movie version of Wolverine is very much different from his comic book likeness. He was named “Wolverine” due to his size (topping off at about 5’4”) and his ferocious animal-like personality. Yet in the movie(s), he is about six feet and wears a black leather outfit without as much of a hint of his trademark mask! I may be seeing things differently, but when I go see a movie based on a comic book, I want to SEE semblances of said comic book! Original costumes and all! Why do screenwriters insist on changing the “tried and true?” Well, some of them anyway.

Hollywood claims that the colors of certain costumes would not translate well onto the silver screen. Who could imagine the sight of actors and actresses walking around and fighting in skintight outfits with loud color schemes? Impossible, they said. But it sure didn’t hurt ticket sales or discourage interest in seeing a man dressed in a blue outfit with a big “S” on his chest wearing a long red cape, or even a friendly neighborhood crime fighter who inherited the abilities of an arachnid now, did it?

They also said that our ‘heroes’ shouldn’t wear masks because the average movie patron wants to see the actors’/ actresses’ faces. But, I’m sure that the real reason is that these studios aren’t too crazy on paying a celebrity millions of dollars to only show their face on the screen for a few minutes at a time.

Stick to the formula, you mooks! It’s only a comic book. There is no logic to the storylines, settings or breast sizes for that matter! It’s fantasy! Believe it or not, the movie fans WANT to see the comic book characters and their stories on the screen, not rewrites! The movie going experience is an escape from reality. Or did we forget that little detail?

Ok, it’s not considered logical for a ‘hero’ to walk around in tight spandex, but we are led to believe that a normal human being can have powers after being bit by a radioactive spider? Is it really believable that someone can have bones made of an unbreakable alloy, but then be considered far fetched if that same person were to wear a mask and a brightly colored costume as well? You tell me.

Flamboyant costumes for heroes on the big screen are not considered realistic, but the sight of a person leaping tall buildings in a single bound?

Yeah, we see that every time.

Right?

URTHLINGS - Section 15

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THE OBSERVATORY - Entry # 0005: CARTOON FLOPHOUSE

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by MRAM
June 18, 2009

Last week I was interviewed by Michael Aushenker from over at www.cartoonflophouse.com!

Michael is the publisher of some of the funniest humor comics in print, including GREENBLATT THE GREAT!, THOSE UNSTOPPABLE ROGUES, EL GATO, CRIME MANGLER and other classic comic books by the GREAT MICHAEL AUSHENKER. =)

In addition to Mike being a fine artist (and I don't mean appearance-wise... or maybe I do, I don't know.) Maybe it's that we were both classmates in high school back in the days when Michael Jackson was dating Brooke Shields and Emmanuel Lewis was their love child. We also endured 3 years of being in a program that magnetized 'gifted' students within the confines of an institution called FAIRFAX HIGH SCHOOL. Which, as fate would have it, just happens to be the epicenter of the Visual Arts Program in the entire Los Angeles Unified School District!

In my opinion, anyway.
(ahem)

Moving right along, Monsieur Aushenker is a very humorous individual, to say the least. There is WAY too many things that keep us from seeing the positives in life and because of that we sometimes lose our ability to laugh. His site helps take a load off by a few big chunks!

His aim, as well as mine, is to help take some stress out of our daily lives with different takes on the world around us. Some days are harder than others, I totally understand, but try to take some time off and enjoy life. Have fun. Read a comic book, or visit a recommended comic site. (ahem...hint, hint.)

Either the experience will help you take the edge off life a little...

...or you'll have a have a good old-fashioned psychotic episode.
(Results may vary...)


By the way, here is said interview! Enjoy...

http://cartoonflophouse.blogspot.com/2009/06/hump-day-q-cartoonist-mike-ramirez.html



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URTHLINGS - Section 14

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THE OBSERVATORY - Entry # 0004: L.A. CELEBRATION

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URTHLINGS - Section 13

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URTHLINGS - Section 12

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URTHLINGS - Section 11

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THE OBSERVATORY - Entry # 0003: THE 2009 NBA FINALS

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CONGRATULATIONS TO THE PURPLE & GOLD!

THE OBSERVATORY - Entry # 0002: KNOWLEDGE IS POWER?

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By MRAM
June 13, 2009

"A Noun is a person, place or thing..."

People enjoy reading about the quirkiness of everyday life, whether it be tabloids, music or news events and such...but today I wanted to give props to an idea that may have contributed to the success of quite a few adults.

SCHOOLHOUSE ROCK...wow.

In the mid-1970's, ABC TV aired these short cartoons, which taught a generation about government, history, grammar, science, and math. These educational, yet entertaining offerings really helped young kids get a grasp on certain subjects that in turn may have proved useful to them later in life.

SESAME STREET, THE ELECTRIC COMPANY & to an extent, MISTER ROGERS also started their runs back in those days. And we all know how thankful parents were knowing that there was a virtual baby-sitter helping in the molding of their children's young minds.

It's normal to just say that some kids may lack the skills in learning or furthering their knowledge in their educational odyssey of Elementary School through College because on the surface, it can appear that they may be lazy, or forgive my political incorrectness...DUMB.

Could it be that those children or young adults in question may just have a learning dysfunction? That if they are taught the same thing in a different way, they may understand it better? Which brings me to SCHOOLHOUSE ROCK.

Can you recite the Preamble of the Constitution of the United States or know how a Bill becomes a law? Maybe you always wondered how an adverb or an interjection is used. Could you ever imagine that Math is really fun if you look at it in a different light? Here's where this little group of cartoons comes into play.

Music can be infectious and certain songs may stay with you for days on end. Take for example the song YELLOW SUBMARINE by the Beatles or the theme to IT'S A SMALL WORLD from Disneyland. (I apologize in advance if one of those songs is now stuck!).

Now add music to something where sights and sounds can easily grab the attention of a child. Let's say, a cartoon. The result, if used properly can be epic.

To this day, I still refer back to some of those clips. All I can do is show you what I mean. Below are a few links to some examples. Take a look and see for yourself. If these things can't help and I'm wrong, may the L.A. Lakers trade Kobe Bryant for a bag of magic beans and a dog that barks with a lisp!

We really need more programming like this to start kids off early. This is just my take, of course. Enjoy!



1.) INTERJECTIONS
http://youtube.com/watch?v=RhHpJ45_zwM

2.) THE PREAMBLE
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Q_TXJRZ4CFc

3.) MULTIPLYING BY 5
http://youtube.com/watch?v=BSnZFykq5n8

4.) I'M JUST A BILL
http://youtube.com/watch?v=mEJL2Uuv-oQ

5.) NO MORE KINGS
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ofYmhlclqr4&feature=related

And finally, my personal fave:

6.) NOUNS
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ZOoGJmZdfMc

URTHLINGS - Section 10

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URTHLINGS - Section 9

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URTHLINGS - Section 8

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HIGH FIVE #000 -- WWW.CARTOONFLOPHOUSE.COM

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http://cartoonflophouse.blogspot.com/search?q=urthlings
Here is a blog post from an high school friend, who just happens to run one of the funniest BLOGS in the comic/art industry! His humor is really "off the wall" maybe that's we get along so well! =)


We did an interview recently and you can find it at the link above
! Also, check out his writings and original artwork on his main site at: http://www.cartoonflophouse.com/

URTHLINGS - Section 7

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URHTLINGS - Section 6

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THE OBSERVATORY - Entry # 0001: THE ACT YOU'VE KNOWN FOR ALL THESE YEARS...

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By MRAM
June 6, 2009

The Beatles.

Unfortunately, I was not able to see them in their heyday, but their music still lives on. I’m not a big fan of Tribute Bands, but there are a few exceptions.The fascination with these types of bands trips me out at times. Some people want to see Tribute Bands as an inexpensive alternative to seeing the real deal in concert. Others are just simply fans of the music and just want to go and listen. In my case, this is the only way to catch a glimpse of an act that has long been out of the public eye.

While we will never, ever get to see The Beatles live on stage again, let alone together, (unless John Lennon & George Harrison pull a Lazarus act and pop out of the ground like weed…er, trees.) I may have just found the next best thing: THE FAB FOUR.

Now I can honestly say I've seen The Beatles live in concert. OK, so they’re not the real Beatles, but they are about as close a facsimile as possible. During one of our landing expeditions…um…visits to Las Vegas last year, the gang and I caught several shows and the best one of the lot was THE FAB FOUR, a Beatles tribute band, at the Sahara Theater.

These guys play everything live "without any tapes, sequences or backing tracks!" These four very talented musicians dress, talk and act like the Beatles and cover the band chronologically with three signature Beatles wardrobe changes spanning 1963-1966. They then proceed into the psychedelic era from 1966-1967 and finally the trying times of the Vietnam war 1967-1969 (well, part of it anyway) up to the Beatles breakup in 1970.

This is one show that's well worth the $50 ticket price. I would gladly pay to see this tribute band again.

The Fab Four covers over 200 Beatles song and they played several of the songs listed on this page when I saw them including: Day Tripper, Strawberry Fields Forever, She Loves You, Twist and Shout, I Want To Hold Your Hand, Yesterday (Paul solo), With A Little Help From My Friends (Ringo solo), Here Comes The Sun (George solo), Imagine (John solo), Revolution and more. I didn't get a chance to write down the complete set list of the performance, because most Beatles songs are very short (2-3 minutes) and I was just too into this show.

Yes, it was THAT great!

In fact, looking through the group's song list, which includes dozens of hits, I don't think saying that The Beatles were the greatest band ever is an overstatement. Who has been a better band over a similar, relatively short period of time? The Fab Four deserve the best grade possible. Grade: A+

Check them out if you get a chance. On our planet we don’t have Tribute Bands. Once a band fades out or if a member passes or goes missing, we just put out their clones.

THE OBSERVATORY - Introduction

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Greetings from URTH!

Thanks to the information taken from the intercepted transmissions of your orbiting satellites, we on this planet, URTH, are able to study your planet and learn what makes you EARTH-lings tick. Our planet, strangely enough, has been heavily influenced by EARTH's many cultures, which is both good & bad. This came as a result of said "intercepted transmissions". Your "Big Blue Marble" has been under our observation since your EARTH year of 1976 by our copycat elders...er,scientists. They have studied your planet's history, past & present.

Their results? Human beings are, for lack of a better word, unpredictable.


The following entries that will be placed in this OBSERVATION LOG will contain the information gathered from our studies and will also have our opinions on random topics. There will also be occasional reports from our veteran scout, "MRAM" who has been wandering your planet since 1976, as well.

All in all, these collected findings will be subject to our "Rants & Raves" and will be archived in the data banks of The Observatory. So be warned,
we are always watching.

Act accordingly.


URTHLINGS - Section 5

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URTHLINGS - Section 4

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URTHLINGS - Section 3

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URTHLINGS - Section 2

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URTHLINGS - Section 1

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