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June 27, 2009


Why is it that so many Earthlings have problems when it comes to operating automobiles? Yet they have somehow qualified to obtain driver's licenses?

Here on our world, every one of us must obey the traffic laws or we risk getting thrown in jail, or incinerated. So, when I scope out the drivers there on Earth, I want to throw up in my mouth. Many of you should not be behind the wheel.

First off, I assume that a red light and a stop sign mean the same for your species as it does for us over here, right? It means STOP, Geniuses! But time and time again I catch reckless individuals driving right through those points and stepping on the gas instead of stopping, let alone slowing down. And don't give me any garbage pertaining to literacy. Red means stop, whether you can read or not.

Worse than running lights are those morons that cut other law abiding drivers off. Ok, I know that they don't care about laws, but it also seems these idiots are oblivious to the fact that these rules were put in place to keep everybody safe. Yet, when someone doesn't signal and/or cuts them off, the intelligence level seems to drop dramatically and these 'so-called' qualified drivers go into one hard rampage freakout. I think the name you have given this disease is "ROAD RAGE". These 'victims' either cuss the other driver out (oh, and more often than not, the other commuter cannot or will not hear the incensed driver), or they will proceed to follow them to do something they might regret later (aw, c'mon, what are they REALLY going to do when they come face to face????). Worse yet, gunfire may erupt on the roadway. But screw safety, right? These RIGHTEOUS drivers are on a justified mission of vengeance. "Grrr...I'm human and I have to take revenge. I have no control over what I do. Grrrr...I allow my anger to take control of me." You are one interesting species, I'll give you that.

Now, my opinion is if you're one of the above, don't get upset if something happens to you or your family. You're that way, so why should someone else be different?

OR!!! Or you can learn to follow the laws. How about less tailgaiting? And less driving 20 mph over the speed limit? Here's a thought - instead of going 70 in a 50 road, why not wake up 20 minutes early? Hey, congratulations! What a nice suggestion! (Can you sense my sarcasm?)

All in all, your world would be a little safer to drive in if you all paid attention. Turn that damn cell phone off and drive!

'What? Nothing's going to happen to me.' Yeah, those are the kind that it happens to. When you feel immortal or invincible, something is going to shut you down fast.